Help! I’ve Become the Geriatric Third Wheel!

When your bestie gets a Sugar Daddy and you get a bonus grandpa for free

Have you ever felt like you’ve stumbled into a bizarre episode of “Modern Family” mixed with “50 Shades of Gray Hair”? Well, welcome to my world, ladies. A world where my 28-year-old best friend decided that app dating was so last season and opted for a more… mature model. And when I say mature, I’m talking about a 55-year-old guy with more money than sense and a concerning obsession with always being around.

Let me set the scene: my friend Sarah and I met in college. We were inseparable, sharing dreams, drama, and the occasional tequila hangover. But then, one fine day, Sarah met Robert (or Bob as he insists we call him, in a painful attempt to seem young and hip).

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not against age-gap relationships. Love is love, right? But when your “girls’ night out” turns into “girls’ night out + that guy who could be all of our dads,” things get a little weird. And by “a little,” I mean “extremely.”

Remember when hanging out with your girlfriends meant gossip, colorful drinks, and complaining about exes? Good times. Now, our conversations are interrupted by comments about the stock market and offers to pick up the tab that would make even an oil sheikh blush. “Oh, you want another round of martinis? Bob…