“Just Snap Your Fingers and You’ll Get Laid”

Mary Carter
4 min readJul 19, 2024

Really?

Today we’re going to talk about something that really grinds my gears: the idea that we women, especially heterosexual ones, can have casual sex whenever we want. You know that phrase:

“Just snap your fingers and you’ll get laid”?

What a load of crap!

I’m going to be honest with you: I’ve had my fair share of casual sex experiences. Some were fantastic, others not so much, and believe it or not I’ve been rejected more times than I’d like to admit.

Yes, we women get turned down too, and it hurts just as much as it does for anyone else.

The Reality Behind the Myth

Recently, I saw a discussion in a private Facebook group about this topic, and I was shocked (but not surprised) by the results. Out of 85 female comments, 32 considered it difficult to find partners for no-strings-attached sex. The rest thought it was easy, but with a lot of “buts” thrown in.

This got me thinking about my own experiences. I remember one night when I went out determined to have a casual encounter. I dressed up, makeup on point, confidence through the roof. You know what happened? Nothing. Not even a glance. It was like I was invisible.

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Mary Carter

I share candid reflections on love, sex, and life's ups and downs, no holds barred and no taboos.